Saturday, January 26, 2019

Detach

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I'm wearing: 

1. Trapper hat with faux fur, from Asos OR if you'd like a women long blazer, this is a good one!
2. Wool coat in black and white, from H&M.
3. Blue sweatshirt, from H&M x Morris & Co.
4. Super skinny jeans in black, from Pull & Bear. 
5. Leather Chelsea boots in black, from Frank Wright.
6. Gloves, from Dents.
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Detach: disengage, remove, leave or separate from a situation or an individual. I've experienced that feeling many times in my life with me being the one left behind (mostly) and as much as I would like to say that it gets easier each time it happens, it doesn't really happen like that. BUT this post isn't about being the one left behind, it's about having to detach yourself from situations and people that are toxic and dangerous. 

During my recent trip to California, some bad things happened to me and my family: my mom's current husband (soon to be ex-husband) lost his mind and became a crazy violent person; I will not go into details because this isn't the time or place but we learned (in the hard way) that sometimes you need to cut people from your life because they're literally threatening it. When we managed to do that, oh God, we were able to sleep again, to laugh and live without complications, it was amazing. 

Toxic people tend to push a hammer down on you so slowly that you don't realise how badly they sink you below the surface. It's not until you detach yourself from them and their drama that you start to remember how things should be and you can start to strengthen the parts of you that were damaged. A toxic person (call it a friend, a significant other, even a family member) will change you and the way you see the world, it's sad but it's true, the important thing here is to not let them destroy your spirit, you need to start seeing those events and people as a way of becoming wiser and tougher. Detaching from bad things is good for your soul.

// Detach: despegarse, removerse, dejar o separarse de una situación o individuo. He experimentado ese sentimiento muchas veces en mi vida, comúnmente siendo yo el que se queda atrás y por mucho que quiera decir que se vuelve más fácil cada vez, realmente no pasa así. PERO este post no se trata de ser el que se queda atrás, es sobre tener que despegarte de situaciones y personas que son peligrosas y tóxicas. 

Durante mi recente viaje a California, algunas cosas malas nos sucedieron a mí y a mi familia: el esposo (próximamente ex-esposo) de mi mamá tuvo un ataque y se convirtió en una persona violenta y loca. No quiero entrar en detalles porque no es ni el momento ni el lugar pero aprendimos (a la mala) que a veces necesitas cortar gente de tu vida porque están amenazándola literalmente. Cuando logramos hacer eso, oh wow, pudimos dormir otra vez, pudimos reírnos y vivir sin complicaciones, fue lo máximo.

La gente tóxica tiene a empujar un martillo sobre nosotros de forma tan lenta que no nos damos cuenta cuánto nos hunden bajo la superficie. No es hasta que te despegas de ellos y su drama que empiezas a recordar cómo deberían ser las cosas y puedes empezar a fortaleces las partes de ti que fueron dañadas. Una persona tóxica (llámese amigo, interés romántico, hasta familiar) te va a cambiar y la forma en que ves el mundo, es triste pero es cierto, la cosa importante aquí es no permitir que destruyan tu espíritu, tienes que empezar a ver esos eventos y gente como una forma de volverte más fuerte y sabio. Despegarte de las cosas malas es bueno para el alma. 
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Love always,
Henry.

Photographer: Mom <3

Currently listening: Laura Jean Anderson - Love You Most.

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