Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Love and heartbreak

Love & Heartbreak
Love & Heartbreak 4
I'm wearing: 

1. Biker leather jacket, from H&M.
2. Rolling Stones t-shirt, from H&M.
3. Super skinny jeans in black, from Asos.
4. Suede Chelsea boots in black, from Frank Wright.
5. Rings, from H&M.
Love & Heartbreak 6
I have a heartbroken heartbeat, I've been the king of unrequited love for a long time now and, as much as I try, that's not an easy title to handle. The people I should like, I don't and the ones that I like don't like me back (at least not in that way). I've seen lots of people around me suffer terribly due to bad relationships, lose themselves in the other person and being destroyed without much hope to get back up again. 

Love is a strong thing, it's a big motivation to do stuff and we're not supposed to take it lightly. People tell me that I shouldn't worry, that one day, I'll find the perfect girl and I'll fall hard for her. I blindly believed that when I was 18; by the time I was 21, I started to have some doubts and; now, I'm not really sure I'll ever find her. The thing is, I need to start focusing on what love means to me, on the things I look for and appreciate how my constant and permanent heartbreak has shaped me into the guy I am today.

Evil... That's the other keyword I pushed for this month. I don't think the girls that I've liked have been evil, I think some of them might've been a bit abusive (maybe unconsciously) but I don't think someone who receives pure love can give evil feelings in return... Yet, what do I really know about love and relationships, right? The only thing I do know is that, like I said at the beginning, I have a heartbroken heartbeat and come what may, it's a part of me, one that might be hard to embrace but it's something I have to accept. We love, we're evil, we break hearts and ours get broken as well, it's who we are, it's what we do... And with all that, it's still up to us to become a better version of ourselves...

// Mis latidos son de un corazón roto, he sido el rey del amor no correspondido por mucho tiempo y, por más que intento, no es un título fácil de llevar. No correspondo a la gente que debería corresponderle y no le gusto a las que me gustan. He visto mucha gente a mi alrededor sufrir terriblemente debido a malas relaciones, perderse en la otra persona y destruirse sin mucha esperanza de levantarse nuevamente. 

El amor es una cosa fuerte, una motivación grande para hacer cosas y no deberíamos tomarlo a la ligera. La gente me dice que no debería preocuparme, que un día encontraré a la niña perfecta y me enamoraré fuertemente. Creí eso ciegamente cuando tenía 18 años; para cuando tuve 21, comencé a dudarlo y; ahora no estoy realmente seguro de alguna vez encontrarla. La cosa es, necesito comenzar a concentrarme en lo que significa amor para mí, en las cosas que busco y apreciar cómo mi constante y permanente corazón roto me ha moldeado en lo que soy hoy.

Maldad... Esa es la otra palabra clave que empujé mucho este mes. No creo que las niñas que no me han correspondido sean malas, creo que algunas han sido un poquito abusivas (quizá inconscientemente) pero no creo que alguien que recibe amor puro pueda regresar sentimientos malvados a cambio... Aún así, ¿qué se yo de amor y relaciones, no? Lo que sí sé es que, como dije al inicio, mis latidos son de un corazón roto y venga lo que sea, es una parte de mí, una que quizá es difícil abrazar pero es algo que debo aceptar. Amamos, somos malos, rompemos corazones y nos rompen el nuestro también, es quiénes somos, es lo que hacemos... Y con todo eso, aún está en nosotros convertirnos en mejores versiones de nosotros... 
Love & Heartbreak 3 Love & Heartbreak 5 Love & Heartbreak 2
Love always,
Henry.

Currently listening: Oh Wonder - Lose It.

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